Sweet gentle Virginia Claire, our Vivi girl, whose name means “spring” and “flourishing” and “clear,” and who was born at the beginning of this season that brings new life… She has lived up to her name in just the eight days that she has been with us, bringing a new life to our family and a clear, fresh perspective. She is truly the calmest baby I have ever spent time with. Her older brother’s physical twin, she could not be more different than he in personality. Ford is wild, feisty, determined, and Vivi appears to be preternaturally serene, easy-going and--a godsend in these early days--so sleepy! While her older brother cried for four and a half months straight, Vivi tends merely to squeak if she wants something – and even then, it’s so easy to figure out what she wants and pacify her. She sleeps best when I’m holding her, which I can’t help but take as an affirmation of my role as her mama.
Of course I realize she is only eight days old, and I certainly don’t want to speak too soon. But I am cherishing, treasuring, each little snuggle with this baby child. And her birth was equally different from her brother’s entry into the world, which after four and a half hours of pushing, found us just one push away from a cesarean section. Before I forget, I want to record the details of how she came to be a part of this world!
I had a doctor’s appointment on Monday morning, March 25, the day before my due date. As you may have read, the doctor said the baby was still floating tremendously high, and that it would likely be at least another week before she would be born. At this point, I had already had two acupuncture treatments, two chiropractic adjustments, and was religiously taking my herbs and consuming certain teas in order to motivate the little one to start moving downward. I really hadn’t even had any contractions, real or false, which was pretty demotivating.
The due date, March 26, came and went (NB: I actually think the real due date was a few days before, March 23, but my doctor’s office was going off of March 26 based on an early ultrasound). Brad and I went on a date while Brad’s aunt and uncle watched Ford. We had gotten spicy Indian food the week before, so we decided to get spicy sushi this time, hoping to smoke the little one out of her hovel. For several days, I had modified my exercise routine to include a really brisk walk while pushing Ford in the stroller, and I’d put one foot on the curb to mimic the feeling of doing a stair-stepper. Those were the only times I thought I might feel some crampiness that could be a contraction. But still, it wasn’t much, if anything.
After reaching out to a few natural-minded mom friends, I decided to take one dose of blue cohosh capsules on Wednesday, March 27. I should note, two out of three of these friends basically suggested that I NOT take blue cohosh, since it may carry some risks, and even natural induction methods are still inductions, which means the baby may not be ready for birth. But I was feeling discouraged and concerned that my doctor would pressure me to induce after my Monday (April 1) appointment, and I really just didn’t want to walk down that road. I took a single blue cohosh pill and went to the nursery to pick up some plants. Ford and I spent the rest of Wednesday in the back yard, planting flowers and peppers and herbs and shrubs, arranging hanging baskets and whiskey barrels, and caring for the tomatoes, purple sage and indigo spires that were already in the ground. I was hoping some heavy labor – hauling bags of potting soil, shoveling deep holes and spending lots of time on my hands and knees – would stimulate another kind of heavy labor, the childbirth kind! Alas, I had no contractions, but I did have a pretty yard to enjoy, and Ford loved spending so much time outdoors.
I woke up early Thursday morning, around 4 a.m., with a painful contraction. I decided to start timing the contractions on my phone, and I was having a strong contraction every five minutes. This was exciting! I was sure this was it, so I got out of bed, took a bath, curled my hair and put on makeup, and tidied up the house while I waited for the boys to wake up. I had a sweet time of praying and thanking God for initiating the labor and asking for a peaceful, complication-free delivery. The contractions were still strong and steady at five minutes apart. Brad and Ford both awoke around 7:30, at which time I told Brad I thought I was in early labor. I knew I had a long way to go before we got to the active labor stage, based on my appointment Monday, so I suggested we plan to get some things done around the house and play with Ford for a few hours until the contractions just really became unbearable. I decided to call the chiropractor for one last adjustment, and she worked me in first thing. Brad drove me to my appointment with Ford in the back seat, and then the strangest thing happened. Once we were in the car, my contractions really became irregular. I had been very conscious of leaning slightly forward and not slouching, since poor posture may cause the baby to rotate into a posterior position, like Ford was, and I didn’t want to go through a forceps delivery again. But in the deep cushy seats of my car, I couldn’t help but slouch. As long as I had a seat belt on, I was forced into a slouchy position. I’m wondering if that just relaxed my body enough to stop contracting.
We continued to the chiropractor, who confirmed that my sacrum had popped out of alignment again. She adjusted me and we were back on the road toward home. At this point my contractions were alternating weak and strong, 16 minutes apart, then two minutes, then 20 minutes, then eight minutes. In short, they were all over the map. This persisted all day long, varying in intensity, frequency and length. They slowed down considerably when I laid down, which led me to believe that I was experiencing false labor. I took a brisk walk with Ford and stayed as active as I could, also taking lots of red raspberry leaf to try to synch things up, but nothing I did would get me contracting regularly. By 5 p.m., my nicely curled hair was a mess and my carefully applied makeup was looking pretty bad. I had read online about prodromal labor – wonky contractions that may be intense, but are just irregular enough that they’re not actually doing anything to the cervix that would move labor along. So frustrating. Brad sweetly offered to take Ford and pick up dinner from Central Market. I requested something light, like fruit salad and a brothy soup. We had a late dinner, visited with our neighbors, Don and Carol, put Ford to bed, and I tried at this point to go ahead and stop the contractions. I took a warm bath and drank a pear cider that Brad had gotten for me, trying to relax enough to stop contracting. But they wouldn’t stop! They were as infrequent as 20 minutes apart and as frequent as two minutes apart, usually pretty painful, but totally unpredictable.
Around 8:30 p.m., I decided to go ahead and call my doctor’s office just to get their opinion. Dr. Lori Romberg, whom I had not met, was on call. I explained what had been going on, and she very sweetly and sympathetically confirmed what I had suspected: That I was experiencing prodromal labor. She informed me that it could go on for days or even weeks, and that it really wasn’t doing anything to precipitate true labor. I just had to wait it out. She suggested a take a big dose of Tylenol P.M. or Benadryl and try to get some sleep, indicating a good night of rest may stop the contractions. So I hung up the phone and took 50 mg of diphenhydramine HCl, Benadryl. I had asked Brad if he would mind sleeping on the futon in Vivi’s room, since I was just so uncomfortable and wanted the whole bed to spread out in. Suddenly, I was having contractions every eight to 12 minutes, and each one was incredibly painful, to the point that I couldn’t speak through them. Not to mention, the Benadryl was starting to kick in, and I was EXHAUSTED. Keep in mind, I had been up and active since 4 a.m.! I would dose off for five minutes, then be awakened by an incredibly painful contraction. I’d run to the bathroom, thinking I was about to throw up, then lay on the floor, wiped out, for a couple of minutes until I got the strength to go back to bed. This process continued for a couple of hours. I never threw up, but I just felt awful. The contractions were so painful that I started making these guttural, whale-like sounds to cope with each one. But still, they were irregular, and pretty far apart. Dr. Romberg’s words kept ringing in my head: This could last for a week or longer. When it became clear to me that I wasn’t going to be able to sleep that night, I decided to call the practice again, a little after midnight. I explained to Dr. Romberg that I was in a lot of pain, and even though it didn’t seem like this was in true labor, I thought something strange was happening and would feel more comfortable coming in to the hospital. She agreed that this was pretty unusual, especially the nausea, and suggested I come right over. Brad had just fallen asleep on the futon, so I woke him and we got dressed for the hospital. We called Don and Carol, who told us to come right over. So we scooped up our sleeping Ford and dropped him off in the pack and play at their house. Then it was off to Baylor, a 10-minute drive from our house!
I was miserable and grumpy the whole ride there. I didn’t want to talk or be touched, I didn’t want any music… I just wanted to sleep. And I was frustrated, SURE that this was false labor and that after they checked my cervix, we’d be sent home and told I still had a long way to go. Nevertheless, we checked in to Labor & Delivery, and I met Dr. Buchanan, a very nice resident who was going to do my exam and determine if I stayed or went. I told him I couldn’t handle any bad news, and that if I was only like a centimeter dilated or less, to lie to me and tell me I was at least a couple of centimeters. He did the exam and said, “Do you want me to lie to you?” I told him no, I needed to know what was actually happening. And he told me I was five to six centimeters dilated and very much in active labor! SO ENCOURAGING! I had unknowingly spent the entire “early labor” period at home. He asked me if I wanted an epidural, and I told him yes, but that I wanted to wait a couple of hours. Since my labor with Ford stalled after I got an epidural, I wanted to endure as long as I possibly could. I only made it about another hour before the contractions were just too painful, though. At the point that they called the anesthesiologist, Dr. Haas – the same INCREDIBLE doctor who did my first epidural! – I was seven to eight centimeters dilated and 100 percent effaced. (By the way, Brad almost lost it while I was getting my epidural! He couldn’t see anything gross, but he got really queasy and lightheaded and had to leave the room! The sweet nurses brought him juice and he had to lie down for a while before he started to feel a little better.) Dr. Buchanan told me that in his book, that’s a natural labor, which made me feel like superwoman, but I think he was just being kind, ha. My water still had not broken by this time, around 5 a.m., so once the epidural kicked in, he suggested I rest for a bit and then they’d return to see if they needed to break my water for me. The baby was still SO high, like minus three station, and the bag of waters was the only thing putting pressure on my cervix to dilate and efface it.
At this point, I need to tell you about our incredible labor and delivery nurse, Gina. We totally hit the jackpot with her. She was personable and fun, and she, like Brad, did endurance races like the Spartan Beast race. But here’s the best part: she got her nursing degree and worked for a few years as an ICU nurse, then went to work for an OB/GYN. During her tenure working for the OB, she began working as a doula for some of the clients, eventually deciding to leave nursing to be a full-time doula! After a few years, she decided to return to nursing, this time in labor and delivery. So it was like I had a doula and a nurse in one. And she was such an encouragement and just so knowledgeable. I had some apprehension about allowing the doctor to break my water (artificial rupture of the membranes, AROM). The doctor had broken my water during my first labor, and things just went haywire, so I didn’t know if the AROM contributed to Ford being posterior or anything. After Dr. Buchanan left the room, Jeanie very appropriately counseled me not to let them pressure me into anything I wasn’t comfortable with, and that once the waters break, it’s harder for the baby to turn if she needs to get into a better position. That makes a lot of sense, since the water is what’s buoying the baby and allowing her to move. So I determined that I would just wait as long as I need to and prepared myself for a long wait before my water broke and we got to the pushing stage. Jeanie turned off the lights and encouraged me and Brad to rest. I would fall asleep for a minute or two, then dream that we had forgotten the infant car seat and wake up. Then I would fall asleep again and the blood pressure cuff would activate and wake me up. Then I’d fall asleep and the fetal monitor would shift and a nurse would rush in to make sure the baby wasn’t in distress. Brad got a solid hour and half nap in, but I was still pretty exhausted by the time Dr. Romberg came into the room to introduce herself, around 7 a.m.
Dr. Romberg was this really cool lady with thick-rimmed glasses, a zig-zag part and a hot pink zebra stripe iPhone cover. I had read her bio on the OB/GYN practice website, and it said she was really active in her church community. We said our “hellos” and I asked her what church she went to. Guess what? She went to Watermark, our church! From that point, we were fast friends, talking about which ministries we all serve in and trying to figure out if we had any friends in common. Dr. Romberg said she had texted Dr. Norwood and that he should be in around 8 a.m., about 45 minutes from then, and he would deliver the baby. She said she’d just check really quick to see where we’re at and how much longer it might be. She did a quick peek and her demeanor totally changed! She started yelling for a nurse to get a table ready, then laughed and said she didn’t think I’d make it 45 minutes – she didn’t even think I’d make it four more contractions! Apparently the baby had been moving downward pretty rapidly since I got the epidural and was ready to go! Brad started feeling queasy again, so he laid down while the nurses started counting for me. After the second contraction, they told me to rest but I could feel the baby trying to get out, it was the weirdest thing. I said, “I think the baby’s trying to—“ and before I could say “birth herself,” Dr. Romberg said, “Whoa, here she comes, go ahead and one last push!” It only took two and a half total contractions of pushing, and baby Vivi was here! It was SO DIFFERENT from my experience with Ford! After a long, long labor at home, she came at the hospital in such a hurry, and they were able to put her right on my chest, unlike last time, and Brad had recovered enough at this point that he got to cut the cord, also unlike last time. Vivi had a strong, lusty cry right from the start. They cleaned her up and she scored two nines on her Apgar tests. Brad held her for a long while as the doctors attended to me for the third stage of labor and the stitching. I had gotten a third degree tear since she was born so “precipitously,” and I ended up having a postpartum hemorrhage. They didn’t do a transfusion, opting to wait until they could test my hematocrit levels the next day to decide if a transfusion would be necessary.
About 30 minutes into my 1.5 hour recovery, I got to feed Vivi for the first time. It was such a gift to have that bonding time soon after birth, since I didn't get to see Ford for four hours after his dramatic entry! The song that was playing when she entered the world was "Beautiful Things" by Gungor, and she is certainly just that -- beautiful. She is named after one of her paternal great grandmothers, who is an inspiration and encouragement to everyone who meets her! Praying that Vivi lives up to her namesake's legacy. We are so thankful for our healthy girl.
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